Complaining about how tired I am these days doesn't have the same impact,even on me. It's nearly impossible to feel sorry for myself at the end of a workday because I have to make Deaglan dinner and then still do the bedtime routine. I 'm not even all that tempted to whine to somebody about how many times an hour I have to drag myself into the bathroom because the uterus has already started to put pressure on my bladder.
I've tried to stay conscious and remember what's going on in the world. I've been reminding myself regularly throughout the day that people are suffering, really, really suffering.
Why is it so easy for us to forget? Sometimes I wonder what it would really take for a person to change. You would think that having lived in one of the poorest countries in the world for the first seven years of a life, really knowing hunger, and having felt the shame of begging on the streets, that I wouldn't get too comfortable in this life - so easy and so abundant. But I do get comfortable and forget often.
I donated I reason with myself. What else can I do? That's the question that stumps me.
Since I gave birth to Deaglan I've wondered what I could offer his soul. I know that we take very good care of him. And culturally I can't give him much as far as my birth place. I was raised in a caucasian Canadian family. Lately the answer has been floating through me. I need to give him awareness. Consciousness. This place we live - this isn't the whole world. There is a great lack in a large part of the world. Maybe if I teach him to be aware, maybe something will change.
My thoughts and prayers are with you Haiti. I'm sorry this is happening to you. I'm sorry you are suffering so much.