Someone said to me this morning about having two kids under three, I don't know how you do it. The comment made me feel at once weirdly guilty, like I didn't deserve her sympathy since so many people I know have three and four and even five kids and at the same time thankful that someone noticed how hard this is at times.
Being on maternity leave for the second time has been a completely different experience so far. I'm different. Less neurotic, more relaxed, more humble and lighter in the soul somehow.
Having these kids has been the greatest joy I've experienced so far in my life. I've loved writing about it here because it has allowed me to reflect and record and then look back. The writing seems to increase my level of consciousness - like when I'm about to parent Deaglan in a certain way I ask myself if I would approve of my behaviour if I read about it later. Not that there have been times when I've employed questionable parenting techniques - not yet anyway.
This is a picture of my niece - my sister's youngest and fifth. Isn't she something?