This morning I was able to get Naveen to eat most of his scrambled eggs by promising he could wear his pajamas to the hockey rink. It was my third attempt at bribery. Candy and money were surprisingly ineffective. It’s sad when you’ve used every trick in your book before 9.am.
It won’t surprise you to know that I believe parenting isn’t
about achieving perfection.
Often it's about getting out the door. I
think it’s also about showing our kids that we are human and just trying our
best. Almost every weekday morning, I apologize to Deaglan and Naveen on the
way to school. That’s because for the
half hour prior, both boys lose their sense of hearing which triggers in me the
opposite of good calm parenting. And I know it’s temporary, localized deafness
they suffer from, because a few minutes later they hear my apology just fine.
But “Put on your socks and shoes!” at the top of my lungs 28 times?
Not so much.
After three years of the same old speech, I feel that
Deaglan and I understand each other, the way an old, weary, married couple might
understand each other; they don’t always like each other but they know they can’t
change the other person either. As soon as I say something like, “Guys, Mom’s
really sorry for all the yelling this morning. You’re both really good kids and
I love you very much,” he usually responds with, “we understand Mom, it’s okay,
we know how hard it is for you to get us out the door every morning.”
That he says it with sincerity and sympathy, well, I think
it means he’s not planning on divorcing me anytime soon.
And I don’t think this Arctic Freeze we’ve been victim to is
helping me grow as a parent.
This afternoon, I peeked out from under the comforter on the
couch and asked in my most excited, positive voice, “Guys, isn’t it great that
we have three days off to do whatever we want? Mom can “work” on my computer
(aka peruse Pinterest) while you play whatever you want.”
I wasn't afraid to proclaim this several more
times over the next few hours to get them fully on board that Mommy sitting on
the couch completely ignoring them was indeed great. What can I say? I will go the distance for a cause I believe in.
Oh, in case you're wondering, I look sorta like this guy today, only my hair is a little more Jack than his, my pajamas aren't as cute and I don't have a fraction of his energy.