Monday 25 May 2009

Love letter with an apology thrown in

Dear Deaglan,

you turned 17 months yesterday and immediately I felt the need to apologize to you.

You see while you are learning to do all sorts of really neat things like unbuckling your seatbelt in the bike trailer (thank goodness there is a safety belt too), climbing down the stairs (backwards with some help), really enunciating the word 'daddy' (although still no mummy), pretending to blow your nose with a kleenex and really embracing anger, I seem to be digressing.

Picking your nose and inspecting your poop have not only brought me a peculiar satisfaction but have become a daily need I never anticipated. I've also started to feel obsessed about making sure you're wearing a hat and sunscreen and often found my fingers twitching to wipe away your snot and drool.

I know that if you were 12 or 13 you would be mortified and most likely refuse to be seen in public with me but I have to tell you that it seems to be out of my control. I really didn't list this on my five year plan and couldn't have imagined myself picking things off of your highchair after you were done and popping them into my mouth without hesitation. Iused to be appalled by such behaviour myself, and wouldn't dream of going two days straight without a shower.

So today, the day after you've turned 17 months and have made me and your dad so proud by the progress you continue to make in your development, I wanted to document this apology. I hope you will show me some mercy when you realize that I have become a big mushy ball of mother and that it wasn't intentional. I hope someday when I am fixing your hair with my saliva, you look at me and shake your head and dismiss it as just me being me. I also hope that when you bring your first girlfriend home for dinner you roll your eyes lightheartedly when I whip out your baby pictures and proceed to remember every goo and ga you ever uttered.

I hope my sweet baby boy that someday you forgive me for becoming this bragging-about-you-unapologetically, covetous, worry-wart, gushing, adoring, too-much-affection-giving, making-you-the-centre-of-my-universe type of woman that I have morphed into since the day I laid eyes on you. I honestly don't know how it happened. But I do hope you take pity on me and cut me some slack and always know that at times I swapped my dignity for your your well being and I never once regretted it!

love M-u-m-m-y (sounds just like it's spelled)

19 comments:

  1. You really do need to save this and show it to him someday. Very touching...

    I've been thinking of writing a letter to my little one for him to read some day.

    Happy 17 months, Deaglan!

    By the way, cool pool!

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  2. Deaglan is one lucky baby/ toddler... Hope you show this to him some day! Nice pic too!

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  3. Jamie's first word was "happy" but I think that "mummy" followed soon after.
    Love the letter!

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  5. You will not believe me when I say this, but it is the truth. In 10 or 12 years, your sweet little boy is going to gross you out a lot of the time. I can tell you right now that boogies, toots and dirty ears on a 17 month old are veeeerrry different on a 13 year old. (And then add in BO and stinky feet.)

    But then they realize they want girls to like them and tyhey clean up nicely again! :)

    Deaglan will love reading these entries when he's older. (Have you seen the sites that print your blog into a hard-bound book?)

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  6. This is lovely... and so clever... and sooo true!!!! But time will change this as well, and you will be glad you recorded your thoughts and memories. I wish I had. Happy 17 months to Deaglan! And to you, too, Mom and Dad!!! You are a wonderful family! ~Janine XO

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  7. what a sweet, sentimental post for your son! i, too, never thought i'd be one of 'those' mommy's either. these boys sure do have a way of making us gush over them!

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  8. Deaglan is a very lucky boy to have such a devoted and loving mom. It's so important to remember these treasured moments together. I look at my big boy of 12 and can still see that little 17 month old reaching for my hand. Enjoy each and every minute :)

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  9. I am not the crying mushy type but this brought tears to my eyes.... You can't go wrong loving them TOTALLY.

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  10. really sweet but he won't appreciate it til he's at least 30. just sayin. Nice thoughts. ~rick

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  11. Adorable! I'm sure he'll forgive you after reading this. :)

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  12. What a sweet letter to a sweet boy. Isn't it funny how quickly we become the woman we never thought we would as soon as our babes come along? Happened to me too, in the blink of an eye!

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  13. Hi Kim,

    I like your post. When are you going to write your book so your husband does not have to work any more...HAHAHA

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  14. Oh, he'll forgive you, and he'll be thankful that he had a mom in his life who cared. By the way, we are in that stage now of the kids bringing home the boyfriends/girlfriends. It is different, but it is an exciting stage, too. wb

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  15. My two oldest boys are Mama's boys, but my youngest is not. Doesn't matter, they all love me and I love them. When, and if Deaglan goes thru the standofish stage towards you, you will know it's just a front. He will always love his "mummy"!!!

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  16. your son is SO LUCKY to have you! you are such a great mom. may he love and appreciate and adore you FOREVER!!

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  17. Mummy's and their little Sonflowers, a match made in heaven. :D

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  18. Beautiful and well said. Lovely photo and I am so proud of your "digression". What a wonderful Mummy you are.:)

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