Thursday 23 June 2011

For a long time we were a family of eight

I nibbled on the sandwich and tucked my seven fries neatly into the saran. We never got our own when we came here; forget even hoping for a hamburger or Happy Meal. My mother packed tuna or baloney in the big red cooler. By the time we got to them, the sandwiches were damp and flat. The loose ice cubes had begun melting and seeping through the plastic wrap.

Soggy tuna.

On rare occasions we were treated to a large coke to split between us all, but more often she asked for water in the plastic cups they served the pop in. Thankfully we ate outside on the picnic tables.

Only a stray family or two ever witnessed my humiliation.

Inside was packed with people who’d ordered full meals, munching on Big Macs and Quarter Pounders. I peeped through the window and spied a girl my age. I watched her laugh, a fry halfway to her mouth. Her wild copper hair was tamed neatly into two braids. I couldn't be a hundred per cent but I was willing to bet she was covered in freckles. And my toes curled inside my dirty old sneakers when I saw the gleaming white soles of her Tretorns peaking out from under the table as she stretched back into her chair. 

Her lunch was spread out on the table, the yellow paper of her cheeseburger flattened to hold the burger and fries, a treat-of-the-week still in its wrapper. An older boy sat across from her, his mouth full of McChicken –I could tell because the meat between the buns was not dark like that of a hamburger. I assessed the little family; mother, father, brother, sister – perfect fit at the table for four. No need to add chairs, no reason to track down the manager for an extra table.

I looked around at all of us. My two sisters were quietly eating their sandwiches, the baby on my mother’s lap was grabbing at a straw. The other two boys were chasing each other around the small courtyard. The red cooler sitting in the middle of the table announced our deficiency like a beacon in a deserted night sky.
 The prompt asked us to write a 300 word piece of flash fiction about Life. I would call mine creative non-fiction. I'm also joining Lisa at Two Bears Farm for Memory lane Friday.

Growing up, there were many aspects of large family life, that bothered me. Now that I'm a parent myself, I know those were the aspects that helped shape me into an appreciative, live-within-my-means, type of person. I realize that no matter how often I wish my kids would take better care of their toys, or really "get" how lucky they are, they will never ever grasp the abundance they are fortunate to be a part of.

21 comments:

  1. They will because they have a mom who will teach them and while it may be a long time before it appears as if they know, they do know because their mom is fantastic and so are they.

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  2. So many life lessons growing up. You had beautiful descriptions in this!

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  3. We were 4 and didn't have much - only my Mother stayed in bed crying versus taking us anywhere.

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  4. This is a beautiful line: "announced our deficiency like a beacon in a deserted night sky..." Beautiful descriptions.

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  5. I love your writing so much! I just love your descriptions!

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  6. I felt like I was there. Excellent writing!

    I agree our past shapes who we are. Thankfully it doesn't define us, but there's always a piece of it with us. I often wonder if I spoil my kids. Will they ever know what it feels like to share a tiny bathroom with 7 people and not use the A/C? Nope.

    I came from a big family too. Not much money. I used to hate having a huge family! Now I'm thankful to have them in my life.

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  7. I can relate Kim. When I was a kid, money was tight. My mom likes to tell the story of a time she was able to afford two steaks-one for my dad and one for her. She got my sisters and me hot dogs-but she made a big deal out of those hot dogs making them sound better than the steak she and my dad were having.

    Even though I can afford new things now, I still tend to want to buy second hand to save money. I don't think poverty is something a person ever gets over, and I want Amy to be aware of what it's like to do without, but not be defined by it.

    Your story was absolutely wonderful! Great writing Kim!!

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  8. Love this, Kim. And I can relate growing up in a big family, Happy Meals were non-existent for us. You described it so perfectly. From the "soggy tuna to the rare treat of a large Coke split between you all"...so so good!

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  9. My parents didn't have much money when my siblings and I were growing up and I remember all too well the cooler they would pull out full of homemade sandwiches and bananas. It used to drive me nuts and I would look enviously at the kids who were eating Pizza Hut and Mickey D's as well!

    I love that I can make sure Maya has everything she needs and more, and yet it annoys the living daylights out of me that my daughter doesn't get how fortunate she is either.

    Sigh...

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  10. Very creative and a job well done! If you hadn't said that it was non fiction I would have never guessed.

    Your kids are lucky to learn from the many things that you have to teach them. They'll appreciate it one day too.

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  11. I think every parent naturally wants their kids to have more than they did, but we also have to teach them value at some point or they take it all for granted.

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  12. I love this post. It is so "real". A little girl in this position would absolutely feel this way and you put it into words perfectly.

    My husband had many experiences like this and he did the opposite of you. He has always over indulged our kids to make sure they had more than enough of everything. In other words they were spoiled rotten.

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  13. You wrote this piece beautifully! The only thing that kind of nagged at me was that I couldn't see McDonalds allowing a family to come in with a picnic cooler?

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  14. Large families learned so much in life with sharing etc. We had to split our drink too

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  15. Well done.

    This made me think of something I told my mother the other day. My father, whom I barely have a relationship with, often takes credit for my life accomplishments. I always say he did not help me achieve these things because he really did not offer support. But then she reminded me that even the estrangement that I suffered from him did add fuel to my fire. So, I guess even the negative can have a positive effect, too.

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  16. This is really beautiful and poignant. An excellent reminder for all of us to be ever grateful for what we have; and to pass that on.

    I loved this line: "And my toes curled inside my dirty old sneakers when I saw the gleaming white soles of her Tretorns peaking out from under the table as she stretched back into her chair. "-- for the imagery and poignancy.

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  17. Wow Kim, this post resonates with me. There were 4 kids and 2 (sometimes 1) parent(s) in our household. So, things (finances) would get very "tight", as we called it. I will never forget the time that we went new school year clothes shopping at the Salvation Army...Our boys TRULY are blessed. :)

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  18. You weave poetry and philosophy through your prose :) You are a gift to this world through your creativity and beautiful heart!

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  19. I always enjoy reading your posts so much. I can really picture the scene. Growing up we did go to mcdonalds but it was very rare and a super special treat. I was jealouse of anyone who had Tretorns. I wanted a pair but they were way too expensive. Your boys will know how lucky they are because you are their mother and you will share your amazing stories with them.

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  20. We didn't have much growing up, and even though my circumstances have greatly changed I will forever be scrutinizing what produce is about to go bad in the fridge and what supplies we don't need to double up on. Call me frugal. I call it gratitude.

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  21. I grew up in a big family - where frugality was key. It shaped me, too.

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